Why I support Senator Barack Obama

Friends -



I have decided after much consideration and conversation and questions that I truly needed to express myself and explain my support of Senator Barack Obama. While I will quote a few phrases here and there from other sources, 99% of what you are about to read is my thoughts and my words and has come out of a four year process of questioning every belief and every stance and every political association that I have on every issue and every matter of life and faith.



My intention is to merely make clear why I support him and not to convince you to do the same. I encourage you to make up your own mind in an intelligent way, as hopefully most of you have.



I have been accused of not being a Christian because of my support of Obama and of losing my faith altogether. And obviously the most pertinent question is: How can you support a Muslim-reared terrorist-loving baby-killing anti-American inexperienced candidate for the job of President. And now he wants to spread the wealth around. Have I covered all of them yet? Doubt it...oh, and he's black.While the issue of racism is not an issue with you, you would not believe how much of it I have run into.



The thoughts in this letter are intended mostly for my fellow Christian brothers and sisters, but hopefully everybody will be challenged by them. I'm sure that my words may not be as elegant as others so I will undoubtedly say some things unclearly, or not as accurately as others could. I did not teach constitutional law for 10 years, as Barack did, so forgive my short comings. I encourage each of you to research these thoughts for yourself and come to your own conclusions. Please! Stop. Think for yourself and challenge yourself. You may still end up exactly where you are today, but you will understand it better, and you will be a better United States citizen for it. Here we go.



I believe Barack Hussein Obama is a very committed Christian with just as tainted of a past as you and I, although I may give him a run for his money. I do not understand the attacks that I have heard from conservative Christians and a few 'Christian radio personalities' that claim this election to be one of choosing against evil, as if Barack is the anti-Christ or something. (If I understand Revelation correctly, the anti-Christ is someone the church looks to in leadership and then turns out...he's not a good guy. If this is true, James Dobson is a better candidate than Barack is.) I believe this 'evil' language to be that age old tactic that the political people use to scare you into voting for the 'Christian' Republican Party. Barack has not shied away from his Christian beliefs and his convictions in many interviews and with his life choices. To call him evil is to be truly ignorant and passing judgment on a fellow brother of the same faith. I remember reading something about 'a kingdom divided against itself will fail'. I realize that this was a reference to Satan and his kingdom...but do we resemble this as modern day Christians? That's another topic.



Substantial Issues:

Abortion:

First and foremost, I firmly believe that this issue is an extremely complicated one not one that is easily decided on. Two, I am not an expert in constitutional law or in debating abortion or anti-abortion issues. There have been books, novels and volumes written about this issue, so please if I leave a major point out don't assume that I haven't thought about it or addressed it or am unaware of it…I simply cannot write about every aspect of this issue. Lastly, I hope that everyone understands that there is not one human being alive that is pro-abortion. No one wants to have one.

To most of my friends this is the most important reason that I have apparently lost all my marbles. I will spend considerable time on this issue however let it be known that unlike most Christians I am not a single-issue-voter. How can I vote for one issue and ignore all the others? While I understand where this mindset comes from and I respect the passion and commitment that it takes to vote single issue, I no longer consider it something I can do.



Let it be known that I hate abortion. I would never in a million years encourage someone to get one. However, I also know people who have had them and this is important...I don't hate those people either. They made a choice and though I disagree with that choice, it is not my place to condemn them; it is my place to love them. Barack Obama is not pro-abortion either. Again, I don't know anyone who is pro-abortion. I believe that at conception a human is made. Barack has stated..."How could I be for abortion when I have two beautiful daughters."



Furthermore, I look at WHY I believe this. It's simple...my faith. My bible-based, private school trained, Christian college educated mind says that God creates life at conception. Literally, "in the womb" (the Bible never actually says the word "conception" so don't look for it.) It's a faith thing. It's a God thing. So, here is where I get tied up and where the problem lies. My neighbors don't share my God or my faith and by the laws of this land, which we consider being 'from God', my neighbor does not have to believe in God, or share my faith and furthermore I am not allowed to force him to believe and neither can the US Constitution.



If you look at all these issues through the eyes of the first amendment, you will understand why I am changing my stance politically on the issues at hand. Just keep in the back of your mind and use it if you don't understand why I have changed my mind on so many issues.



More importantly, look through the eyes of Jesus Christ. When he was alive he didn't condemn the Roman government, which was perhaps the most corrupt government in history. Rather, he became a community grassroots organizer who challenged people to love. He started with 12 people and now his message is in every corner of the earth. He challenged people to be the person that they wished everybody was. He was an activist who focused on corruption within the church body and its leaders, not Caesar or the King or the magistrates. He focused on people, not policies.



Please read the first Amendment to the constitution:





"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."


Hence, Congress can not make a law that respects an establishment of religion...i.e. Christianity, Mormonism, Islam, Buddhist and so on. We as Christians forget this and have been blinded by the political system to think that we can ignore this one...or because we are the majority it doesn't matter or apply to us. Well, in order to keep the peace and avoid the tyranny that we left England for...the lawmakers of this land cannot make a law whose purpose is shared only by a religious organization. Otherwise, it would look a lot like the England our forefathers left to start this country.



In most of Barack's debates on abortion he argues also the 'right to privacy.' In other words, since abortion is legal, and since we all have the constitutional right to privacy…then constitutionally speaking a woman has the right to make that choice. Again, I am not well versed in the Constitution and all of it's wording and all of the 'lawyer' speak. To read a speech made on the Senate floor by Barack regarding this issue, visit the following link:

http://www.city-data.com/forum/2008-presidential-election/368337-obama-partial-birth-abortion-tragic-facts.html



Christianity Today also has a very good article that was taken from an interview that they conducted with Barack. You can find that interview here:

http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2008/januaryweb-only/104-32.0.html





This is also worth considering...when it comes to abortion, the only way Roe V Wade can be overturned is by the Supreme Court. Keep in mind that the decision on Roe v. Wade is considered Constitutional, in part because of the above mentioned amendment. The point is this...if abortion is abolished what will happen to the Republican Party's BIGGEST issue that keeps Christians aligned with them? It would be political suicide for it to be overturned, not to mention probably unconstitutional.



If, in the unlikely event that Roe V Wade is overturned by the Supreme Court, the power will then be returned to the states, and each state will decide for itself on the issue. Most states already have policies in place that reflect Roe V Wade almost to the T, so if it is overturned, you will still be faced with overturning it in state by state votes or setting up the laws in which you will be fighting your state for. This will cost billions and billions of dollars to fight.



So, we as Christians can spend billions of dollars trying to get this constitutional Roe V Wade overturned, or we can spend billions of dollars in a grassroots campaign strategy, and reach out to these women in our communities who are facing this choice and love them and show them with our love that they have other choices and that abortion is not the answer.



Health Care:



This is one of the biggest issues that I am voting on. I fundamentally believe that it is a human right to have access to health care. Do I think that universal health care is the end all answer; probably not...do I believe that it is a step in the right direction? You better believe it! In a documentary I watched recently, a former member of the British Parliament was interviewed. He was sitting on Parliament after WWII and was a key part of setting up the universal health care system in the UK. He said this..., "We came out of the war and we as Parliament said to ourselves, if we can spend millions of dollars killing people, we can spend millions of dollars keeping people alive." And I totally agree with that spirit and that notion. To quote my brother-in-law who now lives in the UK, "Government centralized health care has its issues as well, but the fundamental point here is human right versus privilege. This puts me in the Obama camp. Those who deny that health care is a right usually already have it."



Gay Marriage:



This is a ridiculous issue. Again, I do not agree with the act of homosexuality. Again, I ask myself WHY? Again I land on religious preferences. Again, read the first Amendment. So, you don't have to scroll..."Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances." Ask yourself...the sanctity of marriage? Seriously? Isn't the sanctity of marriage what you make it? I know plenty of fatherless children and motherless children who would say that their parents' opposite sex marriage was far less than sanctified. Furthermore...the definition of marriage? Are we really going to vote for someone over the definition of a word? This seems so ridiculous to me. I know some homosexuals, and you know what...they are some really good people. Who am I to keep them from being united? As a Christian I believe the bible says, "It is mine (God's) to avenge." I myself am to love. Christ loved the adulteress and the poor and the homosexual and his disciples just the same. I believe that we as Christians have perfected the act of carrying out hatred towards those different than us by political means. We have traded the violence and the aggression of the KKK for a suit and a tie, but it is the same hatred and racism that drives many of us to press the policies that we do.



Those of you working in a ministry environment, how many gay's do you know? How many of them come to your building on a Sunday morning? If they were to show up with their partner, would you rejoice or would you ask them politely to leave? Many churches ask them to not return because they are a disturbance. Which is more disturbing?



Again, we can continue to spend millions of dollars in fighting this 'definition' or we can spend the money on programs that build stronger marriages, stronger Christians who when they get married aren't unsure of how to handle a marriage, and finally spend time, money, and lots of effort reaching out to the homosexual community. They need our love, not our hate. I am reminded of a song by David Wilcox called Fearless Love. Here is a short version of the song lyrics.



Fearless love, fearless love

Fearless love makes you cross the border

At your church they asked for volunteers

To make a presence in the park

That's where the wicked planned to demonstrate

And carry signs to set a spark

Someone behind you heaved a stone

That struck the thin man behind his ear

So now there's blood upon his sign

Which read 'There's nothing here to fear.'

'The wrath of god,' somebody yelled

'Will punish all of those like him'



Your church is here to fight a cause

And at your feet a fallen man

Whose head is cradled in his arms

Though his blood contains his death

And though the lines are drawn in hate

You drop your sign of Bible verse

And help the wounded stand up straight



They'll say you helped the other side

They saw you haul that soldier's pack

But now how could you carry that man's sign

In your heart the choice was clear

You didn't join the other side

The battle lines just disappeared



On taxes and spreading the wealth around:



I've been to Africa, Mexico, Jamaica...a lot of the world is in dire need of the wealth to be spread around. Furthermore, as a Christian I actually own nothing. Christ says I owe everything to him, I am merely a steward. So, if the government wants to take a portion of my income and make a good attempt to help empower the poor of this nation and try to move them from welfare to work, who am I to disagree with them. "Give to Caesar what is Caesar's."



I firmly believe as it has been said that if the church, and by church I mean a body of believers, NOT a building, did its job, we wouldn't need all these government programs. The problem is that we do. Recently the congregation that I attend built a new building, and while I was not involved with them at the time of the decision, I was involved for a year before we moved locations and have been involved since then. The building cost a ton of money and honestly it's a nice building and I like it...the problem is that the old one was just fine. And then after we moved in, the parking lot wasn't big enough, so we built a new addition to the parking lot for more than I make in a year, and it only added like 50-100 spaces. I had just returned from Africa when they announced it and I got so angry with the congregation that I had to step out for a minute and collect myself. If you go to this congregation, I hope I am not offending you and I truly hope you do not take this personally. I believe the leadership there is very good and I consider them very wise and Godly men.



But seriously, I want to challenge the 'church' and myself. Jesus says the poor will always be among you. He also says to let no one go in need. While Americans define need differently than the rest of the world, I believe Jesus was referring to clothes, food, and shelter. I honestly don't know of a congregation that does this well AND consistently. The physical location of my particular church would not allow any normal homeless or truly needy person to attend or possibly to even get to. It's out of town a bit. And that's too bad. I think if we were downtown, we would do a better job of service to the poor.



So, you say you don't want the government taking your money and giving it to those unfortunate enough to be poor...I challenge each and every one of us to do something about it in your own communities. And after we have tried to do community organizing and tried to bring about a socioeconomic change within that community, and gotten our hands deep into the dirt of the poor and needy in this country...then perhaps we can understand Barack's experience. For those of you in ministry, if you agree with the mockery that the Republican Party has attempted to make at Barack's community development experience, then you are mocking your very existence. I believe that ministers and community organizer's have probably one of the toughest jobs.





Foreign affairs:



This is the other big issue that I am voting on. Our country is not favored in the world today. We have lost ground on a great reputation that was once held by the United States of America. I have wondered for years why we do not at least on a diplomatic level speak to those countries and leaders whom we consider our enemies. Why do we refuse to deal with them in a socially acceptable way? In this regard, Barack's constant commitment to speak to those with whom we disagree with will have an endless positive impact on our standing in the world. The Republicans mock him and say 'while people conspire to threaten our country, "Obama wants to read them their rights." Well, as our constitution states...they do have rights. Innocent until proven guilty is not just a mantra but it must be a worldview.





War:



This is my third big reason. As a Christian, I cannot endorse a war. Period. I firmly believe that Jesus came here to preach love and acceptance by way of tolerance and understanding and patience and respect. I do not believe that he would endorse or support it in any way. Therefore, I fundamentally disagree with us being in Iraq. I do not agree with bringing those responsible to justice. However, I also don't believe that you should just pull out of a mess that you've made. You must stay and finish responsibly. We have the best military on the face of the planet. Did anyone really think that we would lose a battle somewhere? I know we are doing good things in Iraq. We've built schools, roads, basic infrastructure, trained an indigenous Iraqi military and held democratic elections. Is there still work to do there?...probably. Should we pull out as fast as possible? Absolutely not. Remember Somalia?



I do not condemn defense. The nation should remain protected and guarded. The coast guard does an amazing job of defending our shores, and of saving the lives of thousands of people stranded in the waters each year. If our land is attacked we need to be ready to fight for what we have here in this great country. But, I do not see any reason to seek out a fight, which is what Iraq has been. We are there under false pretenses. Osama bin Laden (remember him) is not in Iraq...oil is.



Furthermore...we are spending an astronomical figure on this effort, while people at home are suffering. Again...billions of dollars a week go into Iraq. Billions of dollars that we are borrowing from China mind you. But just think what that same amount of money would have done for education and health care and grants for college and development of renewable energy. This money could have changed this nation forever. I encourage each and every one of you to seriously ask your state representatives and lawmakers to be as aggressive about health care reform and education and getting off of foreign oil no matter what the price of gas is, as they are about this war. The Bible says that where your treasure is, there is your heart also. If this is true of me, is it not true of a government? So, if I look into the pocket book of Uncle Sam, issue number A1A is war. It's not education, it's not jobs...its bullets and tanks and guns.



I was reminded tonight, that up until President George W. Bush we had around a 5 trillion dollar national debt. So, from the time we went into debt all those years ago up until 2000, we only had 5 trillion. The current President has managed to DOUBLE it in 8 years. What happened to the conservatism of the Republican Party?



Non-substantial reasons:



Guns:



The 2nd Amendment.

A well regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the People to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.

Barack Obama has no intention of changing this. The Republican party is using it to scare hunters and the traditionally pro-republican NRA to vote for them. It's all politics people…nothing substantial.


As a personal note, when you look at the UK and you look at Canada…they don't have the right to carry a weapon that is concealed and you have to go through a long process to get a gun…there murder rate is so low it's embarrassing to compare it to ours. And they do hunt and they do have guns. I personally am not the biggest gun fan. Don't own one, don't plan on owning one. And this has nothing to do with hunting. I like deer meat. I greatly accept it when it is given to me by two very important people in my life.



Inspiration and Passion and Emotion:


I cannot tell you the goose bumps that I get thinking that I, that we, could put a black man in the 'white' house. As a human rights activist and somewhat of an outspoken voice for the poor and the underprivileged, and as a person who has seen racism first hand while hanging out with certain Jamaican and African friends...I say it is time for America to take another step towards equalization and the fulfillment of the civil rights movement in which so many African Americans and Caucasian Americans gave their lives. I wish Martin Luther King, Jr. was alive for this. His death has not been in vain. I am glad that his children are alive and seeing their father's dreams come to reality. Not that King dreamed of being president, but just that a man of color could do what Barack has done...is no small thing.



As my brother-in-law has also stated...inspiration. Call us shallow...but Barack is an inspiring person. I believe that Washington is in need of major change. Keep in mind that whoever wins, it will be the first time that a Clinton or a Bush won't be in Washington in 28 years. I truly believe that the change in Washington should be a deep one. Barack is that change. No other political candidate in the history of politics has created a movement like he has. No president elect has ever drawn 250,000 in a foreign country. Not to mention the rallies that he's had here in the states where over 100,000 show up. This is unheard of. In fact...in the town where I live, Springfield...is now considered the key swing city in the swing state of Missouri. McCain was here in June. Obama here in July. Biden and Palin were both here in October, and today Saturday, Nov 1 Obama will return to what is expected to be a 20,000+ person rally. For a democrat to get that kind of audience in the conservative southwest Missouri is unheard of. It would not surprise me if McCain announced that he was coming back before Tuesday.



Many people accuse me of being shallow and of having an 'emotional' connection to Barack and not an intellectual one. I think if you have read thus far, you will have seen that this is not the case. You may think I am shallow for being inspired by Barack, but seriously, I've thought this through and to accuse me of not making an intellectual decision is just an insult.



I do however believe that there are those who have chosen either side because of that precise feeling and I do not think that is a wise way to go about making your choice. I was listening to the local Christian radio station when Palin was in town, and when she was done with her speech the DJ literally said, "I just love her so much. I mean she's a mom." Want to talk about an emotional decision maker. The DJ never listed one issue that Palin addressed as a reason for siding with Palin. Furthermore, over 10,000 people were at the rally. When McCain was here, only about 1,000 showed up. McCain draws no emotional response, and he's not inspiring. Palin and Obama are. The problem is...last time I checked Palin wasn't running for President.



On the flip side, a really good friend of mine who I deeply respect, voted for McCain because of her disagreements with his tax policies. She believes that it will absolutely kill her parents business and so on. I disagree with her, but I respect that she has a legit reason for voting for McCain and is not drawn into the 'hate' game. She is a well informed voter who chose an intellectual reason for her vote.



But, I must now admit to something. When you go through a process and you work out all the rational and all the reasons and all the 'intellectual' stuff…if you are human, you will develop a passion for those beliefs and for those reasons. It's the same with faith. You figure out all the intellectual stuff, and then all of a sudden, you are an emotional wreck and you realize that you need a savior. In that same spirit and with that same process, of coarse I am emotional about all of this. I am down right moved, I get goose bumps, I scream for joy, I GET EMOTIONAL and FIRED UP and PASSIONATE!!! As I hope that you do for your stances and your beliefs. So, if I come across a bit emotional and passionate…yeah, I am.



In fact, Barack was here this evening, and I was there and I was screaming "Yes We Can". I almost lost my voice. There was after all close to 20,000 people there and yelling and screaming is what you do at these things.



I know this has been long and it could honestly be longer. My intent in this message is not to convince you to vote for Obama, though if I have challenged you to test the way in which you think about voting and the way you see policies...and more importantly the way you see people, then I will have accomplished my goal.



In a bible study I am involved in currently, the guy who wrote it gave a great visual example of 'containers.' He showed the audience several different containers and had them state aloud what the container was meant to contain. There was a bowling ball bag, a guitar case and so on...finally he asked a young man to stand up and he pointed to him and said...what is this made to contain. The answer...the power of the living God. Everyone we meet in this world is designed to contain that power within them. The homosexual, the prostitute, the abortion doctor, the unborn baby, the homeless man, the rich man, the preacher, the police officer, the poorest of the poor...everybody. If we can realize this, we will love deeper and go farther into making this country better.



I do not place much hope in politics and I certainly do not think that any politician is any sort of savior. I believe that the United States is only as good as you are. If you want the world to be a better place, you be the better person. Be the change you wish to see. If we truly realize that we can make a difference, we will all be uniting and shouting from the rooftops, "Yes we can."



Now...go vote. Too many people have died to make sure you still have the right to do so. Don't let their deaths be in vain.

Conflicts with Conservatism

I have always wondered what it was like to feel totally liberated from former beliefs that were so dearly held to be true, as in a matter of morality and salvation. I always imagined that I would never truly feel that way. Growing up in a conservative Christian home, I always believed that the people we were saving were the ones experiencing this ‘mind trip’ for changing their entire paradigm of cognitive thought possessing. You know the whole, “I am a sinner, now I’m free…I used to use profane language without thinking about it, I was given into drunkenness, I had sex with those I was in love with…” and so on. Up until recently I could only imagine what it was like to have such foundational and fundamental changes occur in one’s mind. But, now I believe I am beginning to understand.

In the last four years, I have seen the different side of the fence. I am referring to politics and to my conflicts with religion and to the extreme distaste of the way the Unites States Government has abused and crossed it’s own lines of religious separation, and how the religious right have warmly embraced the politics of their ‘savior’ and have blindly and openly called his war seeking policies and nation building tendencies to be doing the will of God.

I am neither anymore a republican nor am I neither a democrat, I am not an independent, or green, or whatever title you would choose to throw on me. I refuse to be defined by a word. Rather, if I was to be described by a phrase, I believe it would be ‘Imperfect follower of Jesus Christ.’ I can not in this day and age use the term Christian. That term has been so abused and so mis-understood that it is no longer an accurate term culturally to describe who I am and where my allegiance falls.

Now, having said that, I am also not at this time ashamed to be described by another phrase, “Supporter of Barack Hussein Obama”, and at this point I expect more than 85% of all my so called ‘Christian’ friends are currently thinking to themselves that I have left my faith entirely and am only living in a false reality, but have forsaken all sanity by following and placing my political hopes and aspirations in the hands of a Democrat/baby killer/sinner/Hitler feel a like/ over popularized Muslim black man. Only three of these descriptions are accurate about Barack, I’ll let you use your brain to figure it out.

There are very simple reasons that I have chosen to endorse Senator Obama, and for the record it should be noted that I have not, nor ever supported Senator Hillary Clinton or any other democrat in the history of my political awareness, so I am not jumping on the bandwagon of the Democratic Party.

One: The war. I was a very strong supporter in going after Bin Laden in the months after 9/11 and I was blinded by my patriotism to a party and to an idea, that I did not understand the problems and the fundamental issues that existed in my countries choice to go to war and kill this man, and the message of Jesus Christ. These two strongholds in my life have such opposite views; it is astounding to me how much conservative Christians allow the Unites States Government to do what it does, “In the name of the Father, Son and Holy Ghost.” Jesus, according to the bible that I have, never endorsed war or violence of any kind, rather he taught how to effectively protest where no one was killed or harmed just affected and forced to see their errors. He preached about being confrontational not violent oppressors and haters of all things different. Hate the sin, love the sinner. I do not believe that as an “Imperfect follower of Jesus Christ,” I could ever endorse a war, unless you tell me who Jesus would kill. I have endorsed war before, but I do not now.

As a republican, and a very typical one at that, we were taught to hate gays and Muslims and any other county that does anything in a socialized manner. Just the mere fact that we, the People of the United States think that we are the top of the world, the best run country in the history of the world and the best at whatever it is we do…is such a complete arrogance and ignorant view of ourselves, it’s no wonder we are so blinded. My best example for this is the European Union. All those bordering countries who practically demolished each other for centuries, now have open borders and a fairly balanced idea of how their union is helping their economy and their people more and more. And, we the Arrogant of the Unites States can’t seem to get along and open ourselves to the two most passive countries in the world, Canada and Mexico. I’m not saying it’s an easy simple thing to have open borders, but I’m saying Europe make us look real shitty.

Another problem I have with the conservative right, is that it favors the rich. Jesus did not. The poor were his hero’s, as they are mine. I can think of no greater man alive today than Michael Nyangi. He’s a young man in Kenya, born into extreme poverty. He’s grown up and realized that he could help the poor get un-poor. He has taken steps to put himself in a place where he is daily on the front lines of the war against Human Rights Violations and Extreme Poverty, and World Hunger. He is not a rich man by the US standards, but he is extremely wealthy and rich in my eyes. I envy him. From the policies I have seen and heard, the Democratic Party is more focused on the middle class and the poorest of the poor in the US.

I could go on and on about the inconsistencies between the politics of the world and the politics of Jesus, but this is supposed to be a blog, not a book. In short, Jesus is not a democracy man. God is not a democracy God. There is no cabinet; the disciples were not in a democratic relationship with him, Jesus was the King…dictator, only voice of guidance. There was no second guessing his decisions or choices, and they were always right.

I realize that a nation cannot accurately run in this manner if the leadership is corrupt. There will be wars and there will be things that I don’t agree with. But I don’t have to endorse them either.

Dreams

I have so many dreams. I am very lucky and fortunate to have several of those dreams fulfilled. I have held the hand of those I have loved, I have kissed my bride, I have walked the ocean shores in three countries, I have dirt on my shoes from 39 states, Mexico, Canada, Jamaica, England and Kenya, I have made a movie that matters, I have written songs that matter, I have been a sound engineer for a professional band, I am doing what I love and getting paid for it, I have a college degree, I have seen my favorite bands live and I have played drums for thousands. Yet, I am not done dreaming and I am not done seeing those dreams fulfilled.

I was reminded the other day about another dreamer. I spent the last weekend on the road with the Chapmans. We played in Atlanta, somewhere in Alabama and finished up in Nashville, Tennessee at the historic Station Inn. On Wednesday I spent the day scouting for places to film a music video that I am doing in three weeks. Throughout the course of this day it became apparent to me that the residents of this particular region sill hold deep roots of racism that are prevalent in the South. This was particularly disturbing to me for obvious reasons and I honestly felt a little bit of the oppression and found it very hard to concentrate on the task at hand that day.

After the scouting was done, I headed back into Atlanta. I had some time to spare, so I decided to stop at the historic district where Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was born and laid to rest. There is a museum there that is not only dedicated to him but to the Civil Rights and Human Rights movement as a whole.

I would like to think that I would feel the way I did no matter what day I was there, but on this particular day, my senses were on sensory overload. I was feeling all these emotions of Jamaica and Kenya and the places I’ve spent time in were poverty and wealth live next door to each other, like St. Louis, Houston, NYC, London and Mexico…even parts of Springfield. Adding to that, it was Thursday, August 28^th…which is the anniversary of the “I have a dream speech” by King. And, that night Barack Obama was going to accept the nomination of the Democratic National Party for the Presidency of the United States. While many here do not share my affinity for Obama, this is irrelevant when it comes to the inherent historical value that lies within, and the blood that has been shed to achieve this goal.

The area of King’s memorial is in a particular part of town, that in all respects is still run down. This was my first observation as I pulled in and headed into the historical section. The next thing you notice as you enter into the parking area (which is free, as well as the museum) is that there are posted signs everywhere that remind you not to leave valuables where they can bee seen, but to move them to your trunk. That’s your fist clue that not all things are right.

As I entered into the museum, I noticed one thing right away, other than my friend Chris who was with me, I was the only white person in the museum…in fact the only white person I saw even walking around. This was very troublesome to me for some reason…perhaps more so just because my senses as I said were way on edge, but that’s just the way it was.

The first room I went into was a room dedicated to King’s last days on earth. I saw pictures of him standing on the balcony of the hotel, drinking his coffee and waving at passerbies. Then, there was a shot and he was on the ground and his blood was flowing. They had a picture of the man with him pointing in the direction where the shots were fired from. They showed him on the stretcher going down the stairs and then they showed his funeral. There was a visitation at one church, and then a few days later, he was transported to another church. His casket was placed in a wooden cart that was drawn by donkeys to represent the poor. The picture showed the streets filled with thousands upon thousands of people who followed the cart for miles as it went through town. By this point I had goose bumps all over my body and was getting very teary-eyed. To add to the mix, the cart was in the middle of the room. I touched it. It came alive to me. All the while, his “I have a dream speech” is playing in a loop over the speakers in the ceiling.

I’ve read about King since I was a little kid, but he was never so real to me as he was on Thursday. He was never as important to me as he was on that day. Sometimes books just don’t do it, and as hard as a history professor tries they can’t teach what you can see and touch and smell.

After I left that room, I wasn’t feeling all that well. I felt myself getting very sad and very overwhelmed with emotion. I made my way through the rest of it very quickly because I was seeing things I didn’t want to see. The last thing I saw was a picture of the KKK and of a lynching. I was sick and I was pissed. I all but ran out the door, not because I was ashamed, I know that I had nothing to do with it and I don’t feel responsible for what happened back then. But, I was feeling so overwhelmed because those ideas and those concepts are still present, and there is still so much work to be done.

I have family members who are racist, I have friends who are racist and it just really hurts. My wife accuses me of being racist at times toward white people because she sees that I hold it against them and disassociate myself from them, which is a form of racism, although not extreme. I do not mean to do this, but I suppose that as it is so vitally apart of who I am, I have a hard time being around or calling friends those who are racist. I think it’s just shallow. I understand where it comes from; it’s just that that in this day and age it just shouldn’t be happening. Yet, it is not only here, but all over the world. Look at Iran and Iraq and Pakistan.

I say all this to make one very simple point. Racism is alive and strong today. It’s found in the US, in the UK, in the members of the UN and everywhere. The only way to truly defeat it is to defeat it within you…To go out of your way and reach out to what is different from yourself and accept that different is not always bad or wrong, it’s just different.

“And when this happens, when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, "Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"

Stuck in a Moment

What is it with life and being trapped? What is it with life and the battle to figure out what matters? What’s next?

These are questions that have been asked of me and questions that I’ve asked myself often over the last few years. And for my part I am sick of hearing them. I spent the better part of my life wondering around aimlessly and I managed to hit it, thank you very much. I also hated it, in spite of what some might say. Being lazy and unmotivated isn’t much fun for a dreamer and a visionary. Yes I just called myself a visionary. It is merely a quote from a friend, so don’t get the wrong idea. And as a visionary and a dreamer, I did what every visionary and dreamer would do…something.

I guess this all started almost 5 years ago when I woke up one day and I knew that there was no way on God’s green earth that I was going to live in Joplin, Missouri any longer than I had to. So, I made a plan to head out west to Colorado. That didn’t work, because I decided that if I was going to move it would be with a purpose. So I found an amazing school in Florida. I flew down, checked it out, and decided to get married instead.

Less than a year after that, I moved to Springfield, Mo…a much more financially and geographically convenient local. There was also a school here that had an audio degree. So, I enrolled and two or three years later…I graduated from college. Not many people thought I would, not many people thought I could…well, I did.

Amidst the craziness of school, I had to find a senior project that I could believe in. My entire purpose for going to school is to come out of it and be able to produce media with a purpose. I’m not talking overly ‘religious’ things, I’m just talking things that are real. Yes I am a Christian, but that doesn’t mean that my films and my songs and my whatever have to be in the same cheese ball-low quality-not even close to real life kind of way that most ‘Christian’ media is associated with. So, I decided to make a documentary about micro-financing and how it is working in the slums of Nairobi, Kenya and a few other places. Didn’t think it would be such a big deal, and I was wrong. Didn’t think I would be directing and editing it, but I did.

I’ve spent almost every waking moment since February of last year thinking about Africa. It is surreal to me that I have been there and back already, and it pains me to think of how long it might take me to get back. I truly miss my friends there.

So, the film is almost finished. It was finished enough for school and a degree, but not quite finished enough for me. And now that that is almost over, and school is over…I’m stuck again. No job, can’t pay the bills, can’t rest, and don’t have much motivation. And for the last two months, I’ve been absolutely burnt out. I could barley get out of bed. I killed myself trying to graduate and somehow I lived through it. And now that the energy and motivation have found me again, I find myself asking those same damn questions… What is it with life and being trapped? What is it with life and the battle to figure out what matters? What’s next?